Looking back, self portrait photography is probably one of my most consistent forms of self expression. Even in middle school and high school I was taking selfies. And more than just the shot-in-the-mirror selfie, I remember setting up my camera on a tripod, composing shots, and directing my vision into a reality. 

When I started taking self portraits the healing + therapeutic nature of it wasn’t my main intention. I’ve always used selfies as a way to express myself creatively, to play with concepts inside my mind, and to document my journey and vessel. 

The healing that comes in front of the lens started revealing itself slowly over time, in the form of various lessons and emotions I needed to confront.

Self portraits, especially intimate + naked ones, really magnify your internal thoughts and force you to sift through them. 

I feel like I wouldn’t have confronted half my inner squidgy feelings if I didn’t have my self portrait practice. It would be so much easier to hide from both my inner and external worlds. 

But selfies really bring those two worlds together - they bring me fully into my body, even when that is a hard thing to do. It makes me see and feel all aspects of my inner and outer world, and work to consolidate any misalignment between the two. 

I’ve learnt a lot about myself over these 15+ years through my self portrait practice. Here’s some of my biggest reasons to jump in front of the lens and start your own self portrait practice:

1. Your journey through life deserves to be documented

We live in a truly wonderful time that photography is so easily accessible to us. Long gone are the days of only the elite few having access to a camera or a photographer. Now, everyone has a camera in their pocket. This gives us the chance to document SO much more of our wonderful world – including our own personal journey’s through it. Your journey through life is a story worth documenting - even if it’s just for yourself. You deserve to have images of yourself in all stages of your life.

2. You can work on your emotional toolkit in front of the lens

Stepping in front of the camera can be super vulnerable - but also incredibly rewarding. Selfies, if we let them, can illuminate areas of our mindset that need gentle attention. By stepping into our self portrait session with mindfulness at the forefront, we can begin to restructure our negative self talk. Instead of letting our inner saboteur and self critic run the show, (ugh those voices can be such a buzz kill), we can tell those old limiting beliefs to hit the damn road, and start to replace them with healthier narratives that better serve us.

3. It is a space to create that is entirely within your control

Being photographed by someone else is wonderful and also a super rewarding process, but one of the greatest things about selfies is that you get to call ALL the shots. This is a creative container all about you, babe! And how fun is that? You can run wild with any ideas that come to mind, and really flex your creative muscles. This space can be the ultimate container for unapologetic self expression.

4. You get to see yourself fully (and work towards embracing all versions of yourself)

One of the scariest things about self portraits is also one of its greatest super powers.

There’s no one else culling your “out takes” or getting rid of your “unflattering” photos. You get to see yourself in all your unedited glory. If approached with curiosity and tenderness, this can be incredibly transformative over time. We all know the feeling of seeing a photo and thinking “…I look like that?” Sometimes our bodies do things we didn’t know that they did. Or they look a way we had no idea – just for a split second in time. Seeing our bodies represented in all their glory allows us to sit with these feelings, and make peace with them. To realize, sure, my body looks like that at this one time for this one second. But it also looks a million other ways in different moments of time. It’s just a moment, and it’s just a bod existing within that moment. Approaching our self portrait practices with a mindset of curiosity and exploration can vastly change the way we perceive and think about our wonderful bods.

5. For no other reason than you deserve to feel good and worthy of photographing

‘nuff said my loves

If you’re an artist, a photographer, an entrepreneur, someone who enjoys creating just for the hell of it, or someone aspiring to be one of the former: then this is for you.

How to do you tap into your creativity…. especially when you’re burnt out, tired, overscheduled, overbooked, depressed, mentally ill, neurospicy, fatigued… the list goes on. How the f*ck are you supposed to find that inner creative that resides within you, when you have a mountain of “buts” in front of you? When there are about 10 different things at any given time, vying for your attention and trying to suck your energy?

If we lean into what we love instead of soldiering toward what we 'should,' our pace quickens, our energy rises, optimism sets in. What we love is nutritious for us.

Julia Cameron

1. Listen

Listen to your heart, to your soul. Close your eyes, take ten deep breaths, and listen to your internal world. If you can meditate: better! If you can’t: breathe, be still, and listen for as long as you can. Ask your internal self what are you curious about? What do you LOVE to do? What are you missing from your life that you feel a pull towards? Spending even just ten long breaths of time listening to your inner world will often illuminate inner desires, needs, wants, and creative whispers that are waiting to get out.

2. Write

Write down your inner world - the loud, the messy, the chaotic, the tired. Julia Cameron (author of the Artist’s Way) advises writing every morning. When I was following her recommendation of stream of consciousness morning pages every day, I was flowing in creative ideas and energy. However - when you are just starting out, finding time to write out your inner world even just once a week can make a big difference. It also helps to have these ideas in paper, to revisit them later when you are feeling stuck - or reflecting on how far you’ve come.

3. Schedule the damn time

Ah, the “but” to stop all creatives in their tracks. “I don’t have time.”

If it is important - we find the time. We have time for social media scrolling, for binging our favourite shows, for checking out and letting our brains consume instead of create. What if you scheduled into your week/month one creative date with yourself. Block it in like a Doctor’s appointment: non-negotiable, gotta show up, time blocked appointment. It could be an hour, a few hours, a whole day (wow the things you could create in a day!) Block in time with yourself to just explore and be curious. Go for a walk and photograph the flowers. Sit by the beach and collect rocks that you like. Make tea and doodle for an hour. Do anything that feels like PLAY - not something you have to do; but something you want to do.

4. Be bored

In a digital age we are inundated with content constantly. Instagram reels, TV, Netflix, Youtube, Facebook… the list goes on. Try turning your phone off for a whole day and see what difference silence makes. Let yourself be bored. Let your attention wander to the way the wind lazily blows through the leaves of the tree outside your window. When you are bored, you are open to new ideas - you are listening to your inner world, and to the creative ideas that want to be heard.

5. Don’t pressure yourself - creativity ebbs & flows

Don’t guilt yourself for not feeling creative. Instead, write, play, stretch, take the pressure off. If we are creative beings inherently, all of our life in itself is art. You don’t need to be actively creating something to be making art. How you live your life, how you love yourself is in itself: art. (cheesy, right?) But it’s true. So revel in the process. Revel in the ebbs, in the flows, and everything in between. We’ve got enough things in life stressing us out and trying to stifle our inner artists: don’t let your own self-sabotage be one of those things. Breathe. Listen. Play.

Blog post photos featuring Luna Yen - pole performer, and creatrix extraordinaire!

“Self-worth: is that feeling that you’re a good person who deserves to be treated with respect”. -Merriam-Webster

The dictionary definition of self-worth may describe a feeling of worthiness – it’s important to also consider self-VALUE. Self-value is how you act towards what you value; and that includes yourself.

Many of us can get our sense of self-worth tangled up in the trap of comparing ourselves to others, and in turn we create a warped view of ourselves based on external opinions. We place too much value on comparing ourselves to others abilities, appearances, and achievements – rather than honouring ourselves as we are.

Achieving, or not achieving a goal has nothing to do with your worth as a human. What really matters is that how fulfilled are you with the process of doing whatever it is you’re doing (the magic really is in the journey, not the destination).

You are the heart and centre of your life. You are the epicentre of your joy, your self-worth, your journey. You are both the destination, the journey, and the driver.

So fire up that engine, and make sure you top up the oil in your self-worth machine. Because if you can keep that fire burning, no matter what life throws your way, you will always have yourself to depend on.

You have something that nobody else in this world has; your unique views, opinions, creativity, intellect, physical abilities, character traits, personality, life story, values, morals, ethics, and most importantly – inner voice.

You are your greatest superpower.

You are deserving of love and respect, no matter what. When you see the worth in yourself regardless of outer influences or experiences, the value you hold towards yourself shifts, and as a result alters your actions going forward. You have your own back. No matter what happens externally, you hold the power in your own life.

Claim your worth – your beautiful, important, unique, authentic, and powerful identity - because you’re the only YOU in this world, and you’re f*cking incredible.

One of our beautiful client’s (who is now one of our sweet darling brand ambassador’s) shared this post in our Facebook Community – and I immediately asked if I could share it on the blog, as it was just such a beautiful insight into the client perspective. I hope ya’ll enjoy! (and join us in the group - it’s pretty awesome there).

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I wanted to share a little bit about my experience and my reason for booking my session. (I get a little esoteric with it but if that’s not your vibe, totally cool).

For those who are curious or also into goddess devotional practices, Friday is also known as Lady FREYJA’S day. In Norse Mythology, She is a goddess most closely related to unapologetic self love, sexual agency, and death (she also has a chariot of 2 cats which I think is pretty darn cool). I was reflecting on what this day means to me (since Friday the 13th is a significant day in the devotional practices related to her), and I was reflecting on my boudoir session back in January.

I had been looking at photos from Misty Moss’ Instagram and kept telling myself “oh I’ll book one day” until the day I had a fight with my ex. I think it was over him trying to police my body so naturally my gut told me “he can go eff himself I’m gonna go book”. So off I go to book my session. I had a wonderful consultation with Molly, who was so lovely to talk to and got me HYPED for my session….which ended up being like 10 months later due to a traumatic break up, moving, a job loss, and general nonsense.

SO FINALLY, the day of my session rolls around. Y’all I was stressed, I was convinced I was not gonna look like everyone else, and my pain points (a term I learned from the My Aligned Purpose episode with Molly) were LOUD AND HAVING A FIELD DAY.

So day of, I followed the instructions, and rolled up to my session nervous as heck and not knowing what to expect.

As soon as I met Molly in person and the session started, I felt instantly comfortable, and all the anxiety I had melted away. Alison gave me the most AMAZING makeup look (I was worried that maybe the foundation wouldn’t match my skin tone, but she knows what she’s doing, KILLED IT, and I looked amazing) , and we started shooting! The whole time I felt so safe and comfortable, and got to live my model fantasy.

The reason for me writing you a novel today is to share a little bit of myself love journey, my experience shooting with Molly, and also just a little about myself on the chance someone in this group can relate a little!

I started practicing goddess devotion in September/October as a way to begin to heal and rebuild from an abusive relationship, and I truly feel that lady Freyja helped guide me to this experience which helped set me on the right course, learn about body neutrality, given me the gift of being a brand ambassador, and introduced me to this amazing community of iconic humans.

Ah, our inner critic. We all have one – originally our inner critics evolved to protect us an to keep us safe from environmental and social dangers. But now they're kinda just this archaic pain in our asses that makes us feel small and inadequate - and who the hell wants to deal with that.

We can rationalize that our inner critic was originally put in our brains to help steer us clear of danger. However, sometimes our ever vigilant inner critic is doing more harm than good. So, how do we disempower our inner critic?

The first step to resolving negative self talk and knocking that inner critic off their high horse - is understanding WHY it happens, and WHO is doing the talking, and WHERE those thoughts are really stemming from (cause we learned those negative Nancy thoughts from someone). Who is your inner critic, what is their common script, and what response do you get when you hear that voice? It can help some people to actually give their critic a name, identity, character, a voice different from their own. Some examples: the judge, the saboteur, or give it a name (mine’s name is Brad).

Your inner critic has been trained to protect you, but it’s in a very basic way. On the surface it may seem like you are being mean and verbally abusive towards yourself, but underneath your mind is trying to identify what the danger is. How can you get to the safe space? What is it that you ACTUALLY need that is going to make you feel secure?

You may have critical thoughts like: Why am I like this? Why do I always mess up?

So, when you notice those critical thoughts arise you can ask: What is the purpose of these thoughts, what reaction does this bring up for me? Do I feel triggered? Do I feel bad about myself? What is the Judge trying to tell me? What perceived danger does it feel like it needs to protect me from?

When our inner critic, saboteur, or judge starts speaking up, we can begin to disempower it by acknowledging it. When we notice that our critic is paying us a visit, we should stop and say "ah, there goes my inner saboteur today. Thanks for the visit but kindly fuck off!"

If your inner critic doesn’t listen to you when you tell it to kindly pipe down, it might be time to try to listen and befriend the inner voice.

Some psychologists acknowledge that befriend our inner critic can be instrumental in lessening its control over us – and working through the impact its intentions have on us. Think of a situation in which you were in a judging or critical mindset – and reflect on how your inner critic may have been trying to protect you. Use the space below to thank it for trying to keep you safe – let it know that ultimately you are the one in control of whether or not you will listen to its "advice".

This part of yourself always has and always will, deserve to be heard. Have a conversation with them, is what they are saying to you true? Question it. If you were my friend, would you be saying this to me?

Kill it with kindness, soothe the voice and say: “we are not pursuing perfection”. Move from I to WE, the inner critic seems to think you are alone, remember that so many people have experienced what you are, fear or failure, standing out or greatness, someone has experienced this before, you are not alone. You can reach out to community, look up YouTube videos or articles online that can help you work through thoughts that arise with the shared experience.

With continued work and conversations with inner critic, the voice that comes up will start holding less weight for you.

When you feel yourself experiencing harmful thoughts from your inner critic, take a pause to emotionally centre yourself.

Breathe into where you feel tension, soften where you can.

Create a safe space, find your centre, allow yourself to feel grounded, breathe into it.

Imagine/visualize your inner critic, perhaps child-like, tired, irritable, angry, and doing the best they can with what they know.

Huge them, forgive them. They’re just trying to protect you.

Let them know it’s okay, the protector can stand down now because you got this.

When we can work together with our inner critic and identify what our needs are, that there is no danger in what we are about to experience, and that we are capable of so much more, incredible shifts can happen.

Through this practice we can start changing the narrative of our inner critic and even create an inner cheerleader instead, using the moments of pause and reflect to allow us to be here now, in the present moment, preparing and encouraging us for our best next step.

When was the last time you allowed yourself to be intimate with yourself?

In a deeply intentional, and sensuous way.

It doesn’t need to be sexual – although it can, if that’s what moves you and heals you.

It just needs to be full of intention, connection, and being present with yourself.

Creating a mindful self touch practice can help you deepen your connection to self and can often provide deep healing. You can also combine a self touch moment with words of affirmation as well to create a very potent self care practice.

When first starting out, start slow. Connect with areas of your body that feel neutral, for example your hands, shoulder or any other area that feels comfortable for exploration. Certain areas can be harder to explore, or bring up triggering emotions, which is okay and completely normal, but just remember to be kind, compassionate and gentle with yourself – especially when you are first cultivating your practice.

Eventually you can work your way up to placing your hands on the parts of your body that you feel uncomfortable with – and directing more loving energy there. Imagine ending the war on your tummy and being able to hold it with compassion and give it some loving sweet jiggles (my favourite way to explore my tum is in the bath where I can jiggle it around and make silly sounding waves with the water. It’s such a light-hearted way to bring some joy back to an area that has previously been a source for a lot of negative emotions).

When starting to explore parts of your body that trigger body image trauma, go slow. Place your hands over that part of you and just hold them there in a kind and loving way, breathing with yourself for a few moments, even closing your eyes if you want - noticing what it feels like to just hold yourself and send love to areas that you held unloving thoughts for, without judgement. If you’re feeling particularly cheeky or want to bring a little playfulness into your practice, I like to give those parts little loving tugs and jiggles – much like you’d give a puppy little playful pats and jiggles. Treating my body like a soft cute animal is one of the best ways I’ve learnt to reframe the way I think of my squish!

Self massage can also be a powerful way to connect with your body, aside from releasing tension it can also help you to notice sensations and conversations your body is trying to have with you by holding on to a state rigidity. For example, your neck, shoulders or jawline can hold a lot of tension from stress, so taking time to gently touch and massage those areas and allowing some of that pent up pressure to release can be so relieving and satisfying.

You can also give yourself tender kisses on your shoulders, hands, knees etc. as a gesture of thanks for all that they do to carry you through each day. Exploring a self touch practice is creating a space where you can feel supported, soothed, honoured, and cared for in your physical needs. And this includes showering yourself with those little affections like kisses on the shoulders. Whenever I take a bath I love to give my knees and legs sweet little kisses – just to say thank you to my body for carrying me through life.

Now, more than ever, it’s important to be able to connect with our bodies as we may be receiving less physical care, touch, affection and connection with others. By creating a deeper connection to self in this way, it can bring us back to ourselves, especially during times of stress and disconnect, this practice can be an empowering way to care for yourself.

So, get out there and touch yo self!